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My word for 2017...Trisomy 13 - Missing Oscar Day 16

January 1, 2018 how did we get here. Happy New Year...Happy anything it is hard to say that this year. 2017 seems like a blur and the last 6 weeks even more so.

January 1, 2017 I was dreading returning to work. Everyday was hard. Getting out of bed, being at work, or being with family or friends, cooking, cleaning the house, enjoying time with Theodore and Brian. Life was exhausting. By March, life was getting better, happiness was showing its face, and motivation to tackle the day was finally coming back. Brian and I talked about having another child during the 17-18 school year. The plan was to have Kaser Baby #2 late enough in the school year, so I wouldn't have to return to work after my maternity leave and then I would become a Stay at Home Mom. I was really excited about this, being a stay at home mom, because although I love teaching, after my 2016-2017 school year it was becoming too emotionally and physically draining. I was coming home from work and not having energy or was so anxious I was unable to enjoy Theodore and Brian...something needed to change.

Well that change made its appearance on Thursday, April 20, 2017. I found out I was pregnant. A little earlier than Brian and I were thinking, but we were excited. As April turned to May I continued to feel better and like myself. Thursday, May 4, we saw Oscar for the first time. He was dots on the screen, but he was there and everything looked normal.

August 1, 2017, is a day I don't think I will ever forget. I have never cried in front of so many strangers in all my life. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Oscar and that day was our anatomy ultrasound at the MFM office at Toledo Hospital. My belly was scanned for almost 2 hours. Brian and I knew something was wrong with our baby, a cleft lip and a heart defect. Looking back those 2 things are nothing compared to the list Oscar ended up having after all my ultrasounds in utero and his list was even longer once he was born.


I became a researcher and Brian and I became advocates for our son, for our Oscar. Trisomy 13. I never heard of Trisomy 13 until August 1, 2017, and it will forever be a chromosome disorder that has changed our lives. Complications of Trisomy 13 took Oscar from us too soon and now we are without our second son and Theodore without his brother. 

Well what do we do from here in this new year. I am not a 100% sure, but I do know I want to make Oscar proud and I want to remember our sweet second son every single day in 2018 and every day after that as well. I want to make this world a better place like Oscar did. 

2018...here we are and here we go. 
#OscarStrong


Micah 7:1-7...Stick Around to See What God Will Do

  I’m overwhelmed with sorrow!
    sunk in a swamp of despair!
I’m like someone who goes to the garden
    to pick cabbages and carrots and corn
And returns empty-handed,
    finds nothing for soup or sandwich or salad.
There’s not a decent person in sight.
    Right-living humans are extinct.
They’re all out for one another’s blood,
    animals preying on each other.
They’ve all become experts in evil.
    Corrupt leaders demand bribes.
The powerful rich
    make sure they get what they want.
The best and brightest are thistles.
    The top of the line is crabgrass.
But no longer: It’s exam time.
    Look at them slinking away in disgrace!
Don’t trust your neighbor,
    don’t confide in your friend.
Watch your words,
    even with your spouse.
Neighborhoods and families are falling to pieces.
    The closer they are—sons, daughters, in-laws—
The worse they can be.
    Your own family is the enemy.
 But me, I’m not giving up.
    I’m sticking around to see what God will do.
I’m waiting for God to make things right.
    I’m counting on God to listen to me.

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