Wednesday, July 26th, We got home from the lake at about 9:30pm and I was exhausted. Theodore didn’t sleep well the night before at the beach. I went to bed and spent Thursday getting back into the routine of being home, unpacking, going to the grocery, playing with Theodore, and visiting with my sister. She came home with us for a few days to visit.
Friday morning, July 28, Brian and I woke up and got ready for our 4 week check up appointment with our Midwife at our doctor’s office. Jessica was taking care of Theodore that morning and was headed to the library with Brian’s sister and our nephew for some fun filled Learner’s University. We pulled into the parking lot of the Doctor’s office and we prayed for our baby girl and headed inside. We waited longer than normal it seemed like to head back to the examination room. The nurse came in first and asked if I had any questions I told her I didn’t know why our Doctor wanted my ultrasound rescheduled and added extra appointments. She looked at my chart and could not find anything and said the Midwife would definitely know. Brian and I talked and joked as we waited for our midwife to come in the room. Around 9:40am she came in and my first question was why was the ultrasound appointment changed and the other appointments added and why did nobody call me from this office? Our midwife then explained that when we went for our gender ultrasound at My Little Me they called and saw signs of possible birth defects more specifically a cleft palate and heart defects. Immediately I started to cry thinking what did I do to our baby girl? I did this to her. It was my fault. The medication I was on caused the birth defects. It was my fault.
Brian, our midwife, and I sat in silence off and on the rest of the appointment as tears streamed down my face. Our midwife explained to us why each appointment was scheduled on Tuesday, August 1, and from here we should start preparing for what our child was going to need: a NICU after she is born, possibly a pediatric cardiologist, a cleft palate team etc. She explained too that our Doctor would petition to our insurance for us to deliver at the other major hospital with a NICU in the area because then she could be there for the delivery. We ended the appointment with the sweetest thing I had heard in over a week, which was our baby girl’s strong heartbeat as our midwife was able to find it right away with the doppler monitor.
Friday morning, July 28, Brian and I woke up and got ready for our 4 week check up appointment with our Midwife at our doctor’s office. Jessica was taking care of Theodore that morning and was headed to the library with Brian’s sister and our nephew for some fun filled Learner’s University. We pulled into the parking lot of the Doctor’s office and we prayed for our baby girl and headed inside. We waited longer than normal it seemed like to head back to the examination room. The nurse came in first and asked if I had any questions I told her I didn’t know why our Doctor wanted my ultrasound rescheduled and added extra appointments. She looked at my chart and could not find anything and said the Midwife would definitely know. Brian and I talked and joked as we waited for our midwife to come in the room. Around 9:40am she came in and my first question was why was the ultrasound appointment changed and the other appointments added and why did nobody call me from this office? Our midwife then explained that when we went for our gender ultrasound at My Little Me they called and saw signs of possible birth defects more specifically a cleft palate and heart defects. Immediately I started to cry thinking what did I do to our baby girl? I did this to her. It was my fault. The medication I was on caused the birth defects. It was my fault.
Brian, our midwife, and I sat in silence off and on the rest of the appointment as tears streamed down my face. Our midwife explained to us why each appointment was scheduled on Tuesday, August 1, and from here we should start preparing for what our child was going to need: a NICU after she is born, possibly a pediatric cardiologist, a cleft palate team etc. She explained too that our Doctor would petition to our insurance for us to deliver at the other major hospital with a NICU in the area because then she could be there for the delivery. We ended the appointment with the sweetest thing I had heard in over a week, which was our baby girl’s strong heartbeat as our midwife was able to find it right away with the doppler monitor.
As Brian and I left the office on Friday we both were numb. Brian was being a rock for me and being so strong. When we got home we hugged for a long time as both of us cried. The rest of our day on Friday was then filled with telling our immediate family and close friends our news and to begin praying for our daughter.
On Saturday, July 29, we decided on our daughter's name. Estella Leigh Kaser. Estella is my mother’s middle name and Leigh is Brian’s mom’s middle name. If you know our mothers they are strong and they are tough. We know Estella Leigh is going to be strong too and a fighter. We decided she needed named early, so when individuals prayed for her they could use her name. Now we wait until Tuesday, August 1, for appointments and hopefully more answers. The Lord knows every breath Estella will take in her life and knows the plans for her future already. Our hope is that through all of this God’s glory will be shown through Stella and our family. Your name means “star” Estella, keep shining bright! For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ~ Psalm 139:13&14 ~
On Saturday, July 29, we decided on our daughter's name. Estella Leigh Kaser. Estella is my mother’s middle name and Leigh is Brian’s mom’s middle name. If you know our mothers they are strong and they are tough. We know Estella Leigh is going to be strong too and a fighter. We decided she needed named early, so when individuals prayed for her they could use her name. Now we wait until Tuesday, August 1, for appointments and hopefully more answers. The Lord knows every breath Estella will take in her life and knows the plans for her future already. Our hope is that through all of this God’s glory will be shown through Stella and our family. Your name means “star” Estella, keep shining bright! For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. ~ Psalm 139:13&14 ~
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